I probably shouldn’t, what with being behind on my NaNo and everything… but I’m going out today. It isn’t with my NaNoBuddies, it’s with some of my other friends, friends that aren’t closer but I’ve had for longer and this is, I’m pretty sure, the first time I’ve been asked to go out with them so, (^_^) what the heck? I’ll finish. Eventually
After all that trouble, all that confusion, all that effort and time I wasted…
I winged it.
I spent hours pondering possible topics, wasting precious NaNoing time to think about it and trying compile the perfect speech and then it all came down to it: The day, the lesson, the open floor and the utter blank and thusly the complete lack of notes.
So, what do I do?
I make people laugh.
I flap arms around and flick my wrists and spew nonsense and make them laugh so much they don’t notice I have no idea what I’m doing.
It’s a gift.
It’s also a pain in the arse.
Parents evening was tonight and my mother is adamant I’m not adequately applying myself in my lessons. Yay. Urgh I hate this night with a passion. Teachers put on all these simpering it’s all in your best interest faces and act annoyingly mean and bitchy and mother dearest gets to ruffle her own feathers over the stupidest things and yell at me. Only she can’t yell because we’re in public, so she settles for dirty looks.
Only this year something new happened
As the typically anally retentive Brits that they are our teachers of the, ‘older generation’ derive their caffeine in take from, rather than coffee, the far more sophisticated beverage, tea. And my music teacher, more or less the very epitome of typical, older generation Brit, had her tea perched delicately on her desk in those irritating little plastic cups. And what do I do?
I knock it over.
Nto on purpose! No, no! The woman irritates me intensely but I wouldn’t do that. It’s just that I… well… let’s say I’m mildly dyspraxic and leave it at that.
Sigh, I’m dreading my music lesson on Friday…
And I pray no one finds this thing.
OK, so this hasn’t exactly going to plan. And I’m still several thousand words behind, but I’m sorting myself out. I’m even updating this early so I won’t make excuses.
I have to do seventeen 1,000 word segments plus the 618 I didn’t finish for Saturday to hit my target. And for school I’ve got to work my Geography Project and English Speech around that. Forgot to mention: I didn’t actually have to do the speech on Thursday as I found out on said day, its not due until Tuesday, and I made up a shitload of bollocks I’m going to have to rewrite because it was inspirational rather than persuasive, which brings me back to the initial problem of having no idea what to do it on. Fuck.
As a result of all this surmounting work I’m getting up and nine, possibly eight, depending on how quick I get to sleep and no later than ten and then I’ll start. 1500 words an hour, minimum. I would turn my internet off but I don’t know how so I’ll put on a my last.fm library shuffle and leave it alone for once so I don’t get tempted to surf around.
I’m going to email my friends and forbid them to let me talk to them (primarily Danny). And maybe even send a lot of angry emails and texts to myself, demanding that I write and other such psychotic things.
And I shall set up a reward system; for every thousand I write I shall read a thousand of Danny’s. And if I hit my target at a decent time I can watch the Avatar: The Last Airbender finale, like I’ve been dying to. And I can also watch Merlin, (which is a British show on BBC that has, in my humble opinion, the highest unintentional slash rate ever) and read Kamo’s Escape! I can do this! Yes!
I’m going to make this work! I have to.
Sounds like a plan, huh? And I think I can finally feel some of that determination stuff leaking in.
…
I’m going to die aren’t I?
I’m going to write this weekend. I mean it! (Yeah Right… Shut Up!) I promised myself 32,000 by bed on Sunday and with T-al as my witness I will get there!
I was all set tonight, to sit down and just write, write, write, when I realised, shit, shit, shit, I haven’t written my English speech. So, naturally I have to do that instead.
Problem?
I have no idea what the fuck to do it on.
This is a conspiracy isn’t it.
NaNoWriMo Word Count Target: 15000.
My Set Word Count Target: 20000.
Current Word Count: 9784.
Long Elaborate Story Short: I’m doomed.
Guess what! I spent all of today and all my free time yesterday surfing through fanfiction rather than catching up on my NaNoWriMo word count. And though I’ll probably be a bitch and whine about it later, for now I wish to share my wonderful discovery. If only with myself.
I have more, brand new, favourite Harry Potter pairings! Amazing, yes?
Well, I was bored, I’d caught up on all my Sirius/Remus fanfiction (slash fan-girl that I am meant I couldn’t resist for long) and my natural procrastinative nature meant I didn’t do my NaNo. I’m behind by four days (that’s eight thousand words) as I type, but that is completely not the point right now.
Anyway, so I was currently finished with my OTP and so I decided to check out some fringe ones like Harry/Ron (though I normally opt for Harry/Draco and Ron/Hermione). In one of these Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan were mentioned and I had to search them up. Still bitter from Sirius’ death and Remus’ consequent marriage to Tonks, I have refused to read the sixth and seventh books, removed the fifth from my mind and – regrettably – have not had a chance to pick up the first four. As a result I only had a vague idea of who the two were. Which was pretty much that one was an artist and the other was Irish.
Double checking who they were, I remembered instantly as a very slash-worthy and very slashed couple and immediately slashed them myself. I also fell in love with Dean who is fucking adorable and dead cute.
But, it seems, that they receive little recognition all by themselves and are more of a side pairing and I quickly read all the fics available on fanfiction.net and didn’t think to search for more elsewhere (which I will do once I’ve sorted out my word count) and just open searched with Dean in the Character box. Skimming through some, I pulled up an adorable little gem about Dean sketching and subsequently snogging Blaise Zabini (who I have also grown to love) in the library.
Naturally I practically fell over myself, squealed for a while and read the others of that pairing, a disappointing two more in total… I was then later prompted to search for Blaise/Draco and also Dean/Draco.
Although I prefer Dean/Seamus of all these pairings, I love them all and in an attempt to return to a previously read fic in my history, to determine favourites, I accidentally clicked on a link to a YouTube of Legolas and Aragorn as just “special friends” that my best friends had watched when using my laptop sometime last week.
I promptly fell in love with and slashed them too. I am also inspired to read Lord of The Rings and watch the movies (to pick out the cute slashy bits), something I’ve never felt the urge to do before, despite being read the Hobbit at a young age by my father.
Oh the weird and wonderful mind of a hormonal (coughhornycoughcough) teenage fan-girl.
And T-al-Damn-It, I’ve got to get back to my NaNo.
Procrastination isn’t just something “we teens” use to get out of work, it’s a nigh on incurable epidemic that haunts us and feeds on our spirits. It creeps through the soles or our shoes and oozes into the skin. It hitches a ride on a gleeful red roller coaster and lavishes itself upon our hearts and brains, relishing on the Pleasure it procures and absentmindedly observing the later strikes of Irritation and Stress.
I appears only cured by Determination, a by product the diseases of Want. But Boredom captures us again, enraptures us beyond understanding and ushers us back into Procrastination’s waiting arms. We have no reason to Want, there is nothing for us.
